Next year for Christmas I’d like a cold. Not just any cold, make sure it’s so debilitating I can’t see the family over the holidays. I mean, just cause the kids traveled a few hundred miles in with my granddaughter doesn’t mean I need to see ’em.
While I’m vacillating between thinking I’ll die and fearing I won’t… I’d also like the heat to go out due to failure of an ancient breaker unavailable at any major hardware chain. Try to schedule it on a Saturday night so the stores that might have it will be closed the next day.
I realize this is a tall order, but if you can squeeze in just one more request, maybe you drop the temp outside enough so a water pipe can burst too. Don’t do it while I’m at the house though, let me get a few towns away so it’ll be a surprise when the neighbors call to say they just had to shut off my water main.
Go ahead and set that up for a Sunday. It’s always more fun to call a plumber on a holiday AND a Sunday.
That’s it Santa. I realize you already got me all of those things this year, but I was thinking with a full year notice I might be able to handle ’em a little better.
BTW… hope you choked on the milk and cookies, you fat maniac.