Dear Santa,
Next year for Christmas I’d like a cold. Not just any cold, make sure it’s so debilitating I can’t see the family over the holidays. I mean, just cause the kids traveled a few hundred miles in with my granddaughter doesn’t mean I need to see ’em.
While I’m vacillating between thinking I’ll die and fearing I won’t… I’d also like the heat to go out due to failure of an ancient breaker unavailable at any major hardware chain. Try to schedule it on a Saturday night so the stores that might have it will be closed the next day.
I realize this is a tall order, but if you can squeeze in just one more request, maybe you drop the temp outside enough so a water pipe can burst too. Don’t do it while I’m at the house though, let me get a few towns away so it’ll be a surprise when the neighbors call to say they just had to shut off my water main.
Go ahead and set that up for a Sunday. It’s always more fun to call a plumber on a holiday AND a Sunday.
That’s it Santa. I realize you already got me all of those things this year, but I was thinking with a full year notice I might be able to handle ’em a little better.
Love, Rob
BTW… hope you choked on the milk and cookies, you fat maniac.
Rob Jones for President 
Awww, Padre, so sorry to hear this is how your Christmas went! (although the story as told comes off as a bit hilarious…) Hope you’re feeling better. Love you!
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Hey Dr Jones. Them’s the breaks. Thanks for the note, though.
Btw – loved your work in “Temple of Doom”.
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Rob, why is it that ANY contact with you leaves me smiling for hours? Love ya buddy!
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Aw, geez. You really caught it! Happy Effing New Year!
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lol at dear santa on the 27th of december. what a idiot !
Guys honestly why do you even bother reading this blog., just check our problogger.net and enjoy.
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omg Rob, first time I’ve wondered over here from V7N, and another time you’ve about made me spew a drink all over my laptop. Damn, that’s rough, I hope the guy in the big red suite actually takes his meds before next year. Then again, maybe you’re right, it’s better off just to ask for it and prepare. :)
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