Glimpse at a NY Times Editorial Meeting

The NY Times first published a shocking expose’ showing Marco Rubio had 4 traffic tickets in 18 years, and his wife had a bunch more. Not unpaid tickets mind you… they just had some traffic tickets.

You know, like normal people that have not been chauffeur driven everywhere they go since the day in the early 90s their husband was elected president.

This amazing revelation brought guffaws from social media, with the NY Times editorial board bearing the brunt of the laughter. The Twitter hashtag #RubioCrimeSpree was active for days as people imagined his other possible sins… ranging from things like returning tapes to Blockbuster without rewinding to failing to pay library fines in a timely manner.

Someone has GOT to keep an eye on him.

And so the NY Times did… following up the story a few days later with the news that when he received an $800k book advance, Rubio “splurged” and bought “an $80k luxury speedboat”!

We clearly don't want a president with a nice boat... right?
We clearly don’t want a president with a nice boat… right?

And of course the liberal Twittersphere began furiously breaking out all their puppet IDs to publicly denounce Rubio for his vile crime of boat ownership.

Rubio boatFunny part: Just as soon as the left started handing out the pitchforks to villagers, some spoilsport published a picture of the offending vehicle.

It’D be nice as small (24 ft) seagoing FISHING boats go, but you probably don’t want to enter it in a race, or get too far offshore for that matter. It makes the SS Minnow look like the QE2.

As @JohnEkdahl points out in a scale overlay… Rubio’s luxury speedboat would float like a cork in a bathtub in Hillary’s pool.

Purportedly a scale overlay of Rubio's boat in Hillary's pool. Oops.
Purportedly a scale overlay of Rubio’s boat in Hillary’s pool. Oops.

And then people pointed out such fun facts as what this boat looks like next to John Kerry’s boat, which is several times longer than and which he does NOT dock in his home state in order to avoid about half a mil in excise taxes. [Wait, I thought Dems LIKED to see the rich pay taxes?]

kerrys boat

And naturally there were references to Ted Kennedy’s choice of luxury watercraft.

At least one guy might have been president if he'd bought Rubio's boat instead of a Lincoln.
At least one guy might have been president if he’d bought Rubio’s boat instead of a Lincoln.

Next the discussion turned to tongue-in-cheek mention what an evil one-percenter Rubio must be to own such a magnificent craft. One comparison showed his residence vs Hillary’s…

rubio v hillary house

So basically twice in the span of a week the NY Times staff has provided mass hilarity to the social media world without trying. The reporter… Michael Barbaro… responded by calling those who laughed at his partisan hack job “haters” and blocking them on Twitter. And of course the more petulant he got, the more people laughed.

where did they touch you

And here is Michael Barbaro’s clever method of handling criticism of his media bias.

Gee, Mikey... was it something I said, sweetie?
Gee, Mikey… was it something I said, sweetie?

Seriously… who would NOT want to be a fly on the wall at a NY Times editorial board meeting? Imagine what it must look like.

SENIOR EDITOR: Alright, we need a serious piece on a presidential candidate. Ideas?

REPORTER 1: I hear there’s evidence Hillary used her position as Sec of State to work around US govt sanctions in return for “charitable donations” from foreign governments.

REPORTER 2: Let’s not forget she was caught straight faced lying to a grieving mother at a funeral, claiming her kid that was killed in a terrorist attack was actually murdered by angry film critics.

REPORTER 3: I heard Rubio owns a nice boat.

SENIOR EDITOR: Quick… GET ME THAT BOAT STORY NOW!

C’mon, New York Times. We KNOW you’re liberal political hacks, but for the sake of appearances you might at least PRETEND you’re journalists. Occasionally. Right?

I'm Rob Jones, and I approve this message.
I’m Rob Jones, and I approve this message.
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