When Facebook Becomes an Abusive Ex

Well, I made the egregious error of telling a friend the truth a while back on Facebook. [Yeah. I know. Silly me.]

He’d just had his account summarily executed on his favorite photo sharing platform… Which was rather important to him given he’s an artist, and it’s somewhat necessary others SEE his work in order for him to, you know, EAT and stuff like that.

So being the tone deaf person I am, I committed the unforgivable sin of pointing out he’s an old white guy, and thereby deserves any grief that comes his way because you people have oppressed us for far too long… etc, etc.

So in order to punish me for what they deemed “hate speech”, Facebook decided we should see other people. Specifically, I should give them my key and leave for 30 days.

But without me there to bat around when they’re angry, bored, or have had a few too many… they decided to go through their old photos and call me up to discuss my past transgressions.

So I get a notice they need to cover up a “potentially offensive” photo I’d posted. Five years ago.

Now they DID say the material posted was ok, they just wanted to make sure the photo was not immediately visible to anyone it might potentially offend.

Umm. OK?

But it wasn’t enough that they’d unilaterally already done so. Now it became important I click to AGREE the punishment they’d meted out was necessary.

Translation: Now look what you’ve made me do to you!

Seriously? No. I kind of thought the picture of the “religion of peace” guy sitting before the heads he’d removed from previous owners kind of underscored the point I was making, ie – it is NOT true that all religions are antithetic to the goal of world peace. Seems ONE group is a tad ahead in that respect.

If you can find a recent picture of the Amish or Methodists doing that, drop me a line.

But alas, though the brutish ex had already punished me by covering the pic, I’d ruined the mood by failing to AGREE I had it coming. Thus began round 2 of retribution.

I TOLD you what’d happen if you backtalk me!

Immediately after I failed to accept their decision that the post was ok but the pic needed a trigger warning to avoid offense, I got a new notice. NOW the post “violates the community guideline against glorifying harmful people.”

They don’t mention which harmful people… but my money is on the Amish. Never did trust those bearded sumbeeches. [And that’s just the women. The guys are even worse.]

So now without having posted for a week and three more weeks to go before I could do so, I’ve incurred a new violation of their community guidelines. For a post written half a decade ago.

But let’s not stop there.

I ain’t gonna take no sass from your friends, neither!

Next they send notes to everyone that had SHARED my post, five years ago. They all received notice that THEY had violated community guidelines. By sharing a post. Five years ago.

Hey. Facebook? Don’t take this the wrong way, but you might want to call a therapist about some anger counseling. Also, take a shower and put on some clean clothes. You’re looking a bit rough.

Meanwhile, I’ve got to check into getting a restraining order. Not sure this relationship is headed in a healthy direction.

I’m Rob Jones… and I approved this message.

Now Tweeting on Twitter

There seem to be almost as many social networks as there are people on the net, but this one has gained enough traction that I figure ignoring it puts me behind the curve. Well, far be it from me to ignore the old adage that it’s easiest to ride a horse in the direction it’s already going.

For those that’ve been hiding under a rock, Twitter is like a mini-blog. It’s a stream of consciousness thing, people write short statements (it won’t take long ones) on whatever is on their mind. Like a blog, it isnt directed at specific individuals, it is seen by whoever “follows” your feed. Also like a blog, the vast majority of what you’ll see either doesnt pertain to you or is simply horse shit.

Maybe it’s a fad, maybe not, but nobody could afford to BUY the kinda publicity Twitter is getting on the news and various talk shows, and there are a lot of people utilizing it that might be worth following to see what they have to say.

Granted… I don’t fit that last part, but I can at least read what the one’s that do fit that profile have to say. Meantime, if you’re terminally bored or just addicted to reading the pithy and/or irascible nonsense with which I entertain myself (hey, it’s a gift), feel free to add me to your list. My Twitter address is:

http://twitter.com/robjones3030

Of course, for following what a few hundred of your closest friends say there’s already FaceBook, which lends itself a bit better to that purpose. [Btw, to those who bare their most intimate thoughts on FaceBook, WTF are you thinking!?]

Twitter might be a better app for following the thoughts of the truly newsworthy and such. For example, I don’t think George Stephanopolis is sitting around waiting for me to ask him to add me as a friend on FaceBook, but I can follow his posts on Twitter without imposing on his privacy.

Gotta admit the biggest draw for many Twitterers (not sure of the nomenclature, should they be called “twits”?) may be the simple fact that the Twitter dashboard doesn’t say “215 idiots are reading your blather”… it says “You have 215 followers”.

How could having “followers” not be good for morale?

I'm Rob Jones, and I approve this message.
I'm Rob Jones, and I approve this message.